• Hux@lemmy.ml
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    1 month ago

    The Cabinet list so far, as it was officially leaked moments ago on NudeAfrica.com:

    State - Matt Gaetz

    Treasury - Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino

    Interior - A t-shirt cannon

    Justice - DraftKings®

    Agriculture - owner of that McDonald’s

    Commerce - currently accepting bids

    Labor - Immortan Joe

    Defense - Vladimir Putin

    Housing and Urban Development - it’s Trump, so probably Herschel Walker, ffs

    Transportation - Elon Musk’s twitter account

    Energy - V. Putin

    Health and Human Services - sold off and privatized between Nestlé, Saudi Aramco, and Ticketmaster

    Education - Kid Rock, Marjorie Taylor-Greene, and Lauren Boebert, and all sewn together as a human centipede

    Veterans’ Affairs - Captain Morgan; under secretaries Jack Daniels and Jim Beam

    Homeland Security - Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman, once the check clears